30 Day Shred.

Blog Readers, this is Jillian:

Jillian, say hi to the Blog Readers.

We've posted about her before, here on Marrying The Hons, cause she is the reason Mareike and I started running again. She's as uber-fit as she looks and a hundred times more tough. She could beat Chuck Norris up. That's how tough she is.

I haven't written much in our 'fitness' area here, mainly because I hate sports. Or at least I say I do. I do. I hate them. My knees hurt, I hate feeling like I can't breathe and my heart is going to pop, along with my eyeballs... it's just not nice. I don't like getting sweaty (which the good and gracious Lord considered when He made me. I don't sweat easily) which again makes it tough for working with Jillian because she says if you're not sweating, you're not working. It's a good thing she can't really see me.

Anyways. So I don't like sports so there hasn't been much to post here. Until today. Since taking over the leadership of Bremen Corps on top of my other job, I just have not been feeling up to jogging. It's just another thing on my To-Do list that feels like work. So I've been looking at alternatives. A couple of months ago, this girl I know in Canada posted on Facebook that she was starting the '30 Day Shred' which piqued my curiosity. I googled. I read about Jillian Michael's fitness DVD, how tough it is but also how effective and that it is all based around a 20 minute workout etc and filed all this information into my brain under 'look at this again later'.

Well, ladies and gentlemen (hello, boys reading my wedding blog!), today is 'later'. I ordered my very own 'Shred - Schlank in 30 Tagen' as it is called in German on Tuesday and today it was delivered (on a side note, why do the people who translate titles into German always feel the need to bland them up? Seriously - '30 Day Shred' has mystery and allure. 'Shred - Schlank in 30 Tagen' makes me as the consumer look lame. C'mon guys!). Along with my watered-down be-titled DVD came my bright red, 1 KG weights and, not fitting in the fitness category at all, my Capote's In Cold Blood that I have been dying to read for years but someone keeps taking it out of the library! At least that problem is now solved.

Anyways. So everything I need is now here for a workout that is anything BUT jogging. There are 3 Workouts in total, the idea being you do one for 10 days and then level up. They are built around circuit training. 3 minutes strength, 2 minutes cardio, 1 minute abs. I got my Amazon pack at the end of my workday. Perfect timing. I came upstairs and put it on to watch it through once. 'This doesn't look that bad' I naively, oh so naively thought to myself. I went and got changed, moved my little table out of the way and started. And then I died. About twice a minute. Holy crow. Oh my. Jeepers. Oh no. I used to do jumping jacks when I was a kid! What happened?! They were nearly the death of me. And there is out-of-character cheerful Jillian telling me 'If you think you're going to die watch Angela (or whatever her name is, the jumping jacks killed my brain) and she will see you through' Whatever, Jillian! I don't believe a word you say, you skinny exercise dictator!

I finished. Having done more push-ups than I ever have at once and shaking all over. I am still shaking. And it's been 40 minutes. Apparently I am now on my way to being 'shredded'. All I can say is - it feels like it sounds and I better have abs like Abigail (or whatever her name is) by the end of this or I am suing for grievous bodily harm. You've been warned.  

p.s. if this hasn't put you off and you are brave enough to join me and letting Jillian beat the crap out of you, you can order Shred - Schlank in 30 Tagen here.

p.p.s despite my griping and moaning, it was quite satisfying, I'm sure I'm going to like it and Jillians comments are encouraging without being cheesy. I like it.